Archive for April, 2005

Saturday, April 30th, 2005


A warning to tomorrow’s oppo and a sign of who might do the damage. Snapped in Tassie. Posted by Hello

Thursday, April 28th, 2005

Is that you jimbob Jim Kerr?

Wednesday, April 27th, 2005


Siddo talk of undefeated season sent me scurrying to Beamers shoebox to find this dispatch to America evidencing last talk of this nature, what, 8 yrs ago precisely! (Click on it if you can’t read it. You get the hang by now, no?)
Talk of winning every game then from Gordy if memory serves me right. P’raps it not so careless if season of ’97 anything to go by…keep an eye on ’97 archives soon to be added for similar shoebox correspondence for old season news…  Posted by Hello

Tuesday, April 26th, 2005

Well, just trying out the technology. Well done all at the weekend a tremendous victory. Could this be the elusive undefeated season? See you all at nets
Siddo

Sunday, April 24th, 2005


Archetypal Beamers’ bowling…
(click on the card to make any sense of it) Posted by Hello

Sunday, April 24th, 2005


Thankfully Caveheart’s attempts to snatch draw from jaws of victory all in vain Posted by Hello

Friday, April 22nd, 2005

And now, here is the Batting Forecast for the Brighton Beamers issued at 1800 GMT on Friday the 22nd of April.

The general synopsis for the start of the season: LOW moving swiftly away. HIGH expected Preston Park by 1400 Sunday moving slowly towards Pub by 1930.

The individual forecasts for Sunday afternoon.

BAY OF RIGBY, 4 or 5, ball veering into stumps. Beard. Poor.

BAILEY, 21, intermittent on-drives. Shooter. Moderate.

SOUTH EAST BEAST, severe storm force 12, variable becoming puce later. Red mist. Poor.

CAVEHEART, 7 or 8, occasionally middled. Back foot. Poor.

CHAFEY, 1, over-excited. Uppish. Very poor.

RIGGERS, 25 or 26, slow, occasionally lucky. Straight one. Good.

NORTH SIDDENS SOUTH SIDDENS, 41, scratchy becoming fluent. Run out. Very Good.

MUSSETT, 8 or 9, wafty wendy. Bowled. Poor.

LOWE, 10, kept low. Moderate.

RICHARDS, 0, calm. Good.

And that’s the end of the Batting Forecast.

Tuesday, April 19th, 2005


Black smoke poured out of the slim chimney stack on the roof of Addison Towers today, signalling that Cardinal Francesco Rigby remains in deadlock over the selection of the Beamers’ team for Sunday. Posted by Hello

Wednesday, April 13th, 2005

TAKE FURTHER NOTICE THAT by proclamation of Vicar Clive Attenborough SSC of the High Church of the Very Beamers the aforesaid presentation shall stand adjourned to the next sessional nets (next week) by reason of the absence of the Under Secretary to the Clerk to the Vicar at tommorows net sessional
Jeremiah Caveheart
Under Secretary to the Clerk to the Very High,
etc etc

Sunday, April 10th, 2005

TAKE NOTICE THAT after nets on Thursday there will be a presentation made to Brother Frank Rigby, as First Captain of the Season, to honour the occasion of and in compensation for the return of the Prodigal Kit, at the Church of the Very High Beamers, The Sunset Inn, Brighton.
Jeremiah Caveheart
Under Clerk to Parson Clive Attenborough SSC
Church of the Very High Beamers,
etc etc