Archive for May, 2007

Tangmere Dispatches

Monday, May 21st, 2007

Dear John,

Their skipper very generously offered a second sub fielder after you left, did the job himself, and then pulled off a spectacular catch at mid-wicket to remove one of his (very threatening) own batsmen. We all know you would have pulled off the same catch with even more athleticism, grace and daring, but the batsman who was out was so fuming he stormed off to the dressing room never to be seen again!

The game was generously played in a very sporting manner but we couldn’t quite winkle them out in the last few overs. The day belonged, however, to his Lordship of Loxhore, who not only thrilled and delighted with a near PB 74, but took a wonderful catch at cow corner off a steepler whilst conducting a text message dialogue with his nearest and dearest about Braton Hicks contractions and the advantages of gas-and-air over an epidural.

I am sure my shirt can wait until the following Thursday but I cannot, and indeed would not presume to, talk for Musso’s trousers.


Musso replies:

Ahh ….Nialls catch (note the correct spelling Niall)……extremely well taken…..

But you have glossed over my inch perfect positioning of him on the boundary in anticipation of just such a shot from the Tangmere ‘Cow-Corner’ merchant.

Also, you appear to be confusing Braxton Hicks with a place we play on tour…Bratton Fleming…..Too much cricket Frank.

Well skippered though *hopes that will get him off the hook*


Are you available? (BETA)

Monday, May 14th, 2007

Why not let the skippers know if you want to play by filling in your details on the availability spreadsheet.

Go on, if everybody does it…it’ll save a lot of bother….

If you don’t want to actually tackle the spreadsheet itself just have a look and then manually send me your dates and I’ll keep it as up to date as I can.

Good luck

Here’s the link again:


Overwhelming Buzz on the Wires

Thursday, May 10th, 2007

First thing, Lulu reports:

Dear Beamers
Joe and Sal had a bautiful baby boy and a beautiul baby girl yesterday. Sal and the twins are well, still in hospital recovering, but will all be at nets next week. xx

Just to prove we are not just a baby announcement service, on the cricket front Sunday is a little, er, fluid.
We have Travellers on the park at East Brighton presumably not giving the due attention to the covers and heavy roller there, so the venue for Sunday’s fixture is in some doubt at the minute, as seems to be the identity of the skipper, as the forecast.
Of course all be resolved at Simon’s 40th celebrations and doubtless 11 bushy tailed Beamers will emerge Sunday morn ready to lead each other in whupping the Headliners wherever they dare turn out.
I look forward to tales of fine deeds in the Battle Sunday eve on my return from Southport
Party well.
There’s some heads to be wet!

A Little Sister for Millie!

Sunday, May 6th, 2007

Mrs Mason writes:
“A baby girl for Jim & Cath born yesterday – 8lbs 2 oz – mother + little one doing well”

Louise and Steve have had another Baby girl!

Tuesday, May 1st, 2007

Beamers, here is the news and the news is good

This morning Louise, after some contemplation, produced another beautiful baby daughter. Born 0935 at 6lbs 14oz.

When asked for a comment for the Beamers Blog Steve said:
“Visceral, no it was”

Sounds a bit scary, but all well now.

And….isn’t she a beaut!!!

A Poem for the start of the season by A. Poet

Tuesday, May 1st, 2007

A grey old Beamer, body wracked
Whose season hasn’t started
Is writing down the bare true fact,
His wisdom thus imparted.

It reads as though it’s started well
The Beamers’ cricket season,
Both games’ve been good, as I’ve heard tell,
Of course, I know the reason-

A little adding up will show;
Of years we have a’plenty
It’s not a club in embryo,
Average? Well, come on boys, as far as I can count
it’s a damn site more than twenty.

Just look around you as you stand:
What a salmagundi!
And now count up the summers spanned
On any chosen Sunday.

We wear the opposition down
With actions wise and knowing.
Those wrinkles don’t convey a frown,
Just years of overthrowing.

So all you Beamers! List ye well!
And do not be out caught.
Please do remember most of all:
Profundity of thought!

Yes, that’s the way to win a game,
Experience and skill!
Without those years it’s ne’er the same,
So come on Beamers! Thrill!

(c) Hugh P
(From the archive circa 2002)

New faces

Tuesday, May 1st, 2007

Don’t you just love it! The Beamers welcomed a couple of fresh young new bloods to the squad.

We welcome Garner, sprightly, yet fuller figured and fortunately willing to put it all behind the ball.

And Jonathan ‘the filth’ Swindells AKA The Vicar of Dobley (Thanks Dave)

Both show significant promise, and with commitment, practice, plenty of support, advice, coaching, nurturing, sledging and Harvey’s look likely to be quite good. Marvellous.